Your World Is You

Most of us tend to think we live in the same world. But have you ever looked into that a bit? If you do you'll see that the reverse is true: We each live in our own world. We wake up every morning and create our world anew. And throughout the day, moment by moment, we re-create our own little world.

Think of it this way: Let's say you know someone who's newly in love. You can probably remember your own experience of that. When we're in that beginning rush of love the world looks wonderful doesn't it? Everything is happy and rosy and you feel like giggling. You feel good about yourself, on top of the world.

Then let's look at the opposite picture: Let's say you make a huge mistake and get fired from your job. You're embarrassed and humiliated and you beat yourself up mercilessly. All you can think about is how really stupid you are. And the world? Well, the world looks like crap. You're short-tempered with everyone: "There just better not be anyone who wants to cut me off in traffic. If I had a tank I'd squash him."

Just considering your own real experience can you say then that the world is real? How real can it be when it can change before your eyes. And how about yourself? How real are you when you think and feel one way about yourself one minute, and the next you're feeling the opposite?

But... behind all those thoughts and notions there's something that doesn't change. Something that's real. You can't really even call it "something". It's simply what we could call being-awareness. It's that constant that you've known since you can remember anything. It's the awareness that you are, that you exist.

It's there before any thought. In fact, it's what knows and sees your thoughts. That being-awareness is what sees thoughts you have about the world being good or bad. When you're in pain and suffering it's what sees that you're suffering.

It's like space, just providing a place for everything to show up. That simple awareness is never upset, never judging, always in peace. It's who you are. And it's the witness to the "me" that you think you are. When you see that clearly you're truly awake. Live your life there. Take your stand there and life has no problems.

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Happiness Is Knowing Who You Are

In a recent posting I talked about the importance of knowing who we are. But why would we care? What we're really looking for is happiness. And isn't that about getting what you want? The answer must be "no" because so many people who have everything are still seeking. Often they're seeking more of what they've already got, only different. But some finally turn to a spiritual search.
Yet I'm here saying that what you'll find in a spiritual search is that the "person" you think you are doesn't exist. We're all objects in space like any other object. We're not independent characters. When the Life Force goes out of us we stop breathing. So how could knowing that bring happiness and peace? It's so simple it's hard to grasp, actually.
Realizing we're not running the show brings contentment and a problem-free life because we realize we don't have to try to be in charge any more. In fact, we realize that there's no I who could ever be in control. Life has always been living us, even when it felt like we were doing it. So now we can just sit back and watch Life unfold, including the unfolding in the form of a body/mind we call "me".

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We Don't Need To Be Victims

The other day a friend (we'll call her Beth) asked me to help her work through a problem. Someone she really didn't want to see kept calling her, asking to get together. Beth had been using excuses or not answering the phone to avoid meeting. Her complaint was that she just wished the person would stop calling and sending emails. She wanted her caller to change so she could be happy. For her the problem was "out there" in the form of the woman calling. But problems are never out there, they're always "in here", in our own faulty beliefs.

With some questioning Beth was able to see that she wasn't a victim unless she chose to be. She realized that all she had to do was to see reality. In this case reality is that the caller is who she is. Without getting angry at her and wishing she would change Beth could just tell the caller that she didn't want to see her. She decided she'd simply tell the truth: that they had different personalities and it wouldn't work for her to spend time together. She could only do this when she also became clear that what the other person felt about her response was not her responsibility. She'd been worried about hurting her caller.

When we realize that Life is just what it is, living is simple. We don't fault a yellow rose because it isn't red. And there's no need to fault a person for being who they are. They don't have to change for us to be happy. We can simply let them be as they are and move away from those that aren't a fit for us.

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Spirituality Is Practical

Sometimes people get involved in seeking what they consider to be a deeply spiritual life by looking for nirvana or some constant state of bliss. That's way off the mark. The true life of reality is practical; it doesn't take you off into some other world. Circumstances don't change. It may sound too common and ordinary. But to think the so-called spiritual life is something special keeps people in the seeking mode for years - years of frustration.

If living a life of clarity doesn't bring contentment, peace, happiness, then what's all the hullabaloo about? One of the most respected East Indian gurus of the last century was a man named Nisargadatta Maharaj, who was a very common man, living an everyday life. When he was asked what it was like to live an awakened life he said it was basically just living a "life with no problems". Doesn't sound very "spiritual" does it? And not being anything special is what makes seeing life clearly so special.

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Happiness Is Giving Up Control

This morning I read a Time magazine interview with mystery writer Sue Grafton. She's just written her 21st book, all of them titled to follow the alphabet, from A Is For Alibi to U Is For Undertow, her latest. Her books regularly hit No. 1 on the New York Times best-seller list.

What I found interesting is what I've heard numerous authors, artists, and sports figures say - that they know they're not running the show when it comes to their talents. Speaking of her main character through all the books, a woman detective named Kinsey Milhone, Grafton says, "...I don't know what's going to happen to Kinsey Milhone because it's none of my business until I get there. So we'll see. I don't tell her; she tells me. I'm just along for the ride..."

When we recognize that we're always "just along for the ride" because we're not running the show we stop trying to control things and getting upset because Life isn't the way we think it should be. That's happiness.

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Knowing Who You Are

To know who we really are we have to inquire and investigate in ways we're not used to. We've all been taught so many things and we're so conditioned over the years that we don't even think about it.

But am I really this "person" who's doing all these things? From the beginning there's been a sense of existence, a sense that we "are". That's never changed. But have you noticed that the thoughts about who you are change all the time? One minute we're on top of the world, feeling great about ourselves. The next minute we do or say something that isn't quite rational and we think, "How could I be so stupid?"

We emerge from childhood to teen years to adulthood and all along we think differently about ourselves. But that initial sense of "beingness - that sense that you "are" - hasn't changed has it? It's the one constant. Why? Because we are that "beingness", not the "smart... stupid... confident... unworthy" person we think we are, depending on the day and the moment. That idea of who we are is constantly changing. How could it be real? And if it's not real why not live in the "being" that you really are and simply witness life as it unfolds, enjoying the mystery.

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Listen to the Ancients

Ancient wise people -- those who are called awakened or enlightened -- have all reached the same conclusion: Life is problem-free when you simply see reality as it is. Instead we usually live by our stories. Stories we don't even know are stories until we probe and investigate. Let's say you feel someone has hurt your feelings.

But can that actually happen? Does anyone have the power to reach into your feelings and make you hurt? No, of course not. The reality is that we choose to feel hurt because what that person said or did is important to us; we think we need their approval. But do we? Can we be sure we'd be better off with their approval?

An opinion about us is just an opinion -- their opinion. Can we know that what they said was about us and not just about the bad mood they happened to be in at that moment, for example? When we question it we see that anyone's thought about us are just that -- their thoughts. And their thoughts really have nothing to do with us.

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Want What Is And Be Happy

Now, that title sounds silly doesn't it? After all, life is always about wanting isn't it? When we're little we want to be older and bigger. As teens we want to get our first car and then we know we'll be happy. Isn't it true that wanting is a constant in your life?

Many years ago when I first began to learn about seeing life as it is, I read a statement by an East Indian sage named Papaji. He said when people get what they want they're really happy for a short time. They think that getting made them happy. But Papaji said no, that's not the reason. The reason they're happy is that for a short time they're not wanting anything, not seeking something more or better. In other words, they're content and at peace for that short time.

When I looked into my own life I realized he was right on. For a short time there's an ease, a relaxing, a going-with-the-flow, a peacefulness that's unmatchable. The ancient wise ones have all advised looking deep into our thoughts and desires. When we do we see that "To crave is to slave" as another East Indian sage puts it. Wanting is the definition of unhappiness: "I'm not happy now but I will be when I get...."

Instead of craving, what if we asked ourselves honestly: Can I really know I'll be happy when I get what I want? Who is this "me" that thinks it needs to direct life and control how it shows up?

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